He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
