I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize