she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
