these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Randomize
