butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
