Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It's just like the Real World with babies
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
