Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
