Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I am one with the molecules
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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