please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
