a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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