Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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