I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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