is your mom at the bar?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
