He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
