I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
So squirting runs in the family.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
