You can't special order awesome
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
NoShamevember. You game?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
You can't just leave with hair like that
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
