Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
