My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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