covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize