do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
