she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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