Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
