Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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