as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
