There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize