you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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