first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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