so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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