I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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