last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
