I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
