was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
And then he peed in my hair
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