You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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