Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
