R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
