All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
