I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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