you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
