so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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