Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
