There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
