chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
