I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
