I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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