He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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