No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
