grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
