This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
