Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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