I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
She's JV to your varsity
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
