hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
